A shocking act on a dark New York highway once left a nation demanding justice, but what followed told a far deeper story about the power of love and forgiveness. In 2004, Victoria Ruvolo drove through freezing rain when a group of teenagers hurled a frozen turkey through her windshield. The impact smashed her face and nearly ended her life, leading to hours of surgery and a long, painful recovery. Yet what happened in the courtroom months later stunned far more people than the crime itself.
When the young man responsible, Ryan Cushing, stood before her, the world expected anger and vengeance. Instead, Ruvolo asked the court for leniency. She embraced her attacker, whispered forgiveness, and expressed hope for his future. Observers sat in silence, witnessing what many called a “moment of grace.” The entire scene powerfully echoed the words of Jesus: “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matt. 5:44).
Such love feels unnatural because it runs counter to how most people choose to live. We tend to love those who love us, support those who support us, and avoid or even resent those who hurt us. Though these patterns seem logical, even fair, Jesus challenged them directly. “If you love those who love you,” He insisted, “what reward do you have?” (Matt. 5:46). His words expose how self-serving expressions of love can sometimes be.
Stepping outside of what is comfortable and convenient, however, is where the greatest acts of compassion reside. Loving your enemies—those who oppose, offend, or wound you—requires something deeper than human nature or instinct allows. Only by deliberately choosing to act against our impulses can we heed our Savior’s instructions to do good to those who hate us (Luke 6:27). Doing so does not excuse wrongdoing, though it often feels otherwise. Yet, mature believers must refuse to let hatred determine our responses to others.
How does this play out in real life? It means extending kindness to a coworker who undermined you or showing patience toward a neighbor who treated you with contempt. Scripture repeatedly reinforces practical kindness with no strings attached. The Apostle Paul instructed, “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink” (Rom. 12:20). Actions like these move love beyond the theoretical into reality.
Living with radical devotion to others does not come easy. Thankfully, God graciously embodies and empowers every principle of faith He establishes. Stated differently, the Lord faithfully and compassionately shows love to His enemies before challenging us to do the same. Need proof? He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good while also sending rain for both the righteous and unrighteous (Matt. 5:45).
Even more powerful, though, is the fact that God demonstrates His love toward us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ Jesus died for us (Rom. 5:8). Long before we sought the Lord in any way, He chose to love us. In fact, we only love Him, because He first loved us (1 John 4:19).
These truths revolutionize how followers of Jesus understand godly love. When we grasp the depth of God’s grace toward us despite our failures, it changes how we see others. For the sanctified, love becomes less about evaluating worthiness and more about reflecting God’s character. Loving others well is our greatest opportunity to display the family resemblance of those who belong to Him.
Still, ideas that are easy to understand are not always simple when it comes to living. Emotions often refuse to cooperate, especially when wounds run deep. Yet, in this context, the key is increasing our commitment in order to break free from the bondage of our feelings. Prayer must be foundational to our efforts (Matt. 5:44b). The goal is overcoming evil with good, rather than vice-versa (Rom. 12:21). Like a muscle that grows stronger with exercise, small efforts will increase our capacity to love well over time. Slowly, our hearts can change.
Ultimately, godly love proves its substance through action. It seeks good for others, even when they have done harm. It prays, forgives, and moves toward reconciliation whenever possible. Jesus summarized this calling with a challenging command to be perfect, or holy, even as our Father in heaven is perfect (Matt. 5:48). Despite our tendency to fall short, God’s desire is that we love others perfectly, even as He loves us.
Adam B. Dooley is pastor of Englewood Baptist Church, Jackson, and author of “Hope When Life Unravels.” Contact him at [email protected]. For more writings like these, visit adamdooley.org.
